Tuesday, November 20, 2007

waiting



i dunno y but i love this image or bumper sticker form facebook hehe..

thr is beauty in waiting... n even more worth if u wait for the right one... the God ordained Heroic love... thr is pain and loneliness in waiting..but love is not self seeking, meaning for me, it does nt seek to satisy ur loneliness...God will send ur hero wen u r satisfy in HIM n seek HIM first, for it is at dat time u r capable of loving the other one or others ppl... wen u r full of luv, den only u can flow ur love...


i noe i noe it is painful, but a sacrificial love is the most high love, it does not only apply on Jesus but on us too... mayb u say i get tis from a movie n all.. but yea, wat i wan to say is dat, if u love a person, surrender the person to God, let the person free to soar...surrender the person to God, bcoz u noe, it is the safest place he or she can be... u noe love hurts alot of time.. sometimes, owning the person bfore the rite timing or wen God din say yes can be hurting the person, u n God... u protect the person by surrending him or her in a save hands like God.. u will hurt the person wen u r nt ready to be committed in a relationship, u holds a lot of emotional bagage n etc..den it will b best to wait on God to deal with urself, as i mention in another post dat love is nt self seeking (nt to satisfy ur loneliness n nt to ease ur emotional bagage). relationship is nt about two ppl, it involve God n even ur family n frens...thr is a certain responsiblity involved....sometimes, fairy tales doesnt end with the prince or princess together happily but rather letting him or her free to chase his or her dreams and happiness...wen u r able to let go a person, den u r able to embrace and understand true love..God let us do our choice too, HE nvr force us to be own by HIM but rather HE let us love n run to HIM by sacrificing HIS son.. also, a mother, who at the end will have to accept the fact she raise her children in order to free them as a capable adult...she sacrifice for her children in order to set them free, chasing their own dreams n happiness, no price could ne paid..dat is love....

in a movie- thr is a part- whr the heroin pray..she mention about diff kind of love dat exsist, a love ever strong yet not voice outvand the tenderness expressed in a stuborn way, keep flowing in the heart, a father love towards the son.. another kind of love, a love that is mystic, the giver give out of control and it comes in a mysterious way, the gentleness is subtle, whr the lover's ex girlfren who patiently wait for him to wake up n take care of him.. another love is the deep sacrifice love, a love that is without shape n in the air..a love that is hope and the cut is made because it is necessary, she have to let the lover free and the cut is made out of a unwillingness to break apart but it is made at the boldness of love.because the lover n the gal love is too deep, the gal make a choice to let go in order to give the lover a better live..she wan the lover to have all her blessing n live with happiness..she wan him to have a full life n dun want to hurt him anymore...(the lover met an accident in order to raise the money they need to build the dream she have)

realization

i realized something thesedays:
i noe i m imperfect n a failure, full of mistake, but once i m child of God, i have to be someone else, because becoming Christian is to die n live again. wen u die, ur new self rise, u r a new being d, a whole new person.. so, nw i have to declare to the cycle of mistake n failure dat it no longer have a bondage over me.. God the ever perfect Father created me with His hand, hw could i be imperfect if i am created in HIS image n likeness? God want to restore me to be the perfect being HE created me..well, even then, i m nt saying dat once i m child of God n declare tis, i can b perfect instancely.. i m simply a fallen human, imperfect, with failures n hurts, slowly letting the Potter hands restoring me to what it is intended to be, the holy spirit control n change me day by day... I m imperfect but HIS perfect LOVE catch me with my flaws. time after time, yes i cry after failures n failures n simply conclude dat i m a failure..but i learned from it n the experience helps me to rely on God.. most of time, the failure is a cycle of past hurts which only God can restore as I release to HIM.

i noe ppl dat is without mistake n can't stand mistake..think about it, it is a mistake wen adam n eve sins.. dats y we strive to make it up by achieving tis n dat n live flawlessly... those mistakes also help me to understand ppl with mistake n hw to fix it or rather hw to deal with the consequences.wat u have go through will grant u the understanding n compassion over ppl who fails in the past..u also learn from past experience n not to repeat it.. its all part of growing up..even albert einstein said, all those failures is nt really failures, he just discover what can't be used for his light.

in the end, yes, i apologise for doing so many mistake..especially over all the trouble cause....

the Perfect LOVE

i m going to reveal something mushy gushy haha....

yeah, i m talking about love...thr are different kind of love ...

i for once pray for a Hero to show up, a light shining armor to swept my feet away.. a hero dat will protect me, love me, believe in my value, accept me for who I am n gently lead me to another level (spiritual)with his heroic or poetic love..he noes i m imperfect but all the imperfect can be conquer with a perfect love... a hero is someone who is willing to fight for me, but dun mistaken it to jealousy of human but rather the fight is to restore back what is sarced to me or what is meaningful to me..for example, he will fight for me (support n pray for me, wen attack from the enemy come, he will take his sword at the right time) wen he noes dat it has been my dream to preach the gospel...a hero also have to be gentleman but dats alone is nt enough, being a gentleman is nt an act but because of courtesy n love (he does not help u to open door becoz u can't do it and let him feel superior bcoz he can do things for u but rather becoz he want to help u in a sincere heart..at the same time of helping, he trust u can do it, so at times, he just beside u, supporting u and give u the support wen u need it. most importantly,a hero will be secure in God love and secure in his position as God child n warrior. a hero is someone strong yet gentle (made in the image of God)...a hero is someone u could c a future in him... a hero dat is gifted from God to u(gals), is someone dat will seek God (the highest force) wen u do and wash ur ears with God words..also, wen u r undergoing a change in ur walk with God (say a deeper level of intimacy with God or a diff season) he will be supportive n protect u, even wen the season is nt easy..he do nt need to say anything but rather hold ur hand n just let his presence hear by u, or pray and cry with u.. a hand dat catch u wen u fall...thr is more..but it is enough for nw...

i was asked one question before, ppl always change, one day, will u wake up n find dat ur love towards the person change especially as u grow older... i just realized one thing, if it is God ordained love, the perfect love will withhold both of them n best of all, God will work with both of them on a level whr one change, one will change to understand wat is going on..it is important dat both of them seek God, therefore able to communicate as they are tie by God together, the changes (eg, diff seasons) will be dealt at a understanding heart-for God will reveal to the another person what u r going through, if both of u r close to each other hearts, put each other in prayer, God for sure will reveal or help u to interceed for each other..God will also allow both of u to go through same spiritual growth as both of u seek HIM together, allowing the understanding of hearts happen... then, the love will not die but grow as the two are able to communicate in the truth of love n have the same spiritual maturity as they seek HIM together.


p.s. yes, i have high expectation for the 'hero' becoz my Father in heaven says i m worth it, same goes with all gals...i noe dat sometime i act strong and thr is no need for a hero..but looks can be deceiving haha..so i still need guys to help me to carry things lol, and lesson number one, wen a gal say no, it means yes, i noe its confusing guys, but too bad..it just gurls haha...they are shy wahahahahah

Friday, November 16, 2007

thoughts.....

just a random post...wahaha.. after finishing my semester n finally tasting freedom ..wohoo..abit not use to b free..haha...but of course it is gud to rest

so ya..the thoughts that are lingering are once again, i find it true that things or ppl come to u when u least think about it...God love to suprise u wen u are nt aware..dats the elements of suprise.. not just with God..even facebooks haha..wen i want ppl to let say send me a drink on the top firends, i try so hard n send it to them haha...but wen i lazy d, i dun care d..all of sudden the drinks flooded in..hmmm..quite a thoughts haha

anyway...i was reading lotsa novel n books nwadays..haha..become bookworm n loving it..i just so happen to read stuff dat i wrote about my journey with God, my dear Father..was really touching n faith just come in..realizing all that i have been through with HIM..hw much His love is for me...I noe I m imperfect but I have the perfect love...

lotsa thoughts are lingering in my head nwadays, especially wen i m quiet...so wen u c my blank n blur face...u noe la..haha...and no, i m not becoming emo... i m simply recollecting thoughts n in needs to use my brains, as God given me lol.. i wasted years not thinking as a notion of my personality n try to change nw.. to b a person dat will use her mind...most importantly, thoughts does come from God and of course urself n the loser devil too.. so yea, thrfore thoughts play a blig role...it crucial u reflect wat come to ur mind or heart, give God the captives of ur thoughts...

Monday, November 05, 2007

time flies....whoosh

yeap...time really fly..faster than an airplane sometimes...without me realizing..i m turning 20 years old this year...and well, i feel old haha...believe me...but one thing, never in any year I look forward for the years to past and to let God unleashed His perfect plan in my life... Its the third year of me in the journey with God, and only one word I can utter, Wow.. and then start starring at the sky and become emo..lol..it just so many thoughts will come to me when I reflect this 3 year journey, and it have been amazing, with joy and tears of course.

Gratitude linger my thoughts, realizing how much i live on other people helps, support and fellowship..at times, how I wish I could be the one that offer helps and support...ah, the desire to grow up and capable come to me again, but this time, taken care by HIM..what can I say beside silently thanking them and trying to show enough gratitude to ppl who have stick by me all this time...my church who just came into the picture of my life have been supporting me like a family and how grateful am I for it.. the Bread (words of God), Water (Spirit) and fellwoship provided by the church has truly been a blessing...

sadly, people come, people leave..memories is the one stay forever...I learn to accept this and cherish the connection while I can...sry la..if u guys think my birthday thoughts are sad and serious, just as anna commended...haha..another gal which I cherish alot and leaving to overseas...yeap, the pain of loss will come soon after she leave, just like the time mun yee leave.. no, I am not starting to become a sad person even as I start to be aware that the world is a place of hurts but then I will look up n smile, for thr is a FORCE bigger than the hurts...i m also suprise by the FORCE, the way HE heal me in issue I never thought exist...the joy which is the strength from HIM...

as times alwiz allow changes to happen..i am starting to miss gud time that i have with ppl n begin to form memories, a sign of growing old as only ppl with handful of memory can do dat...honestly, i miss the time when me, aaron n dan is on holidays, coz we practically hang out the whole day bfore prayer meet n all... now, we r bz with our degree n all..rarely have time for us to hang out n talk (sometimes serious stuff like God, CF, ppl n life, sometimes just crap like games, anime n jokes, lol..fine, its not crap but guys talk)..the two fella is 2 bro in Christ dat i wouldnt trade with anything...i thx God for the friendship form between us, who say gurl n guy cannot have pure friendship? i m close to them, thx to CF, maybe thats keep us together as frens...another precious memory is the bedroom talk n time in anna house... I put the memory close to my heart, a time of bounding with girl..another deep desire of mine, which is to have a God given sisterhood..I at time also vividly remember the time spend with mun yee and joram...a time which will alwiz be a part of me no matter how long. I praise God that HE connect me with this sis in Christ, mun yee and knowing that we will stick together in life, for we have been through tears n joy together..haha, i can't forget the time when we cry together n even fight against each other, yet we made it up with God help...the memory is so fresh, like a still hot just printed paper by photocopy machine.. For joram loo, i thx u for teaching me n believing in me....

Realizing alot of things and continuing to do so..as my Prince continue to pour into my cup...I will drink and drink till I m full...more to come....till next time....

Wednesday, October 03, 2007

Revolutionrally07- the flyers, t-shirt and promo video







Commitee meet





after our long hour of committee meet (this is a special commitee meet as we devote half of the fri to plan for the 3 months of CF) jason being the camera poser (the one in black in the 2 pics), force us to take pics lol......

S is for Spidersssss



looks scary? haha..looks can be deceiving... its death spider and it is cooked.. and as a matter of fact from jason (who oso the one that bring back the spiders from cambodia after his mission trip), he said that only 3 or 4 kind of species of spiders are poisonous.. so don't worry...
i have to admit that the spiders taste crunchy and i m loving it...the funny part is everybody was quite scared and i m the one in charge to pluck off the legs of the spiders as mr ken persuade the cf committee to eat..so conclusion is i eat 3 ..and i love the legs...yummy...haha...all the commitee is like running wild with the spiders....wild hogs day...wohoo...
swensen earthquake ice cream..yummy


the cake for august ppl birthday...


the FOUR (birthday ppl) just a part of ppl dat

have birthday on august


the group ( kdu CF and ex kdu cf or a.k.a swensen groupie)

Wednesday, September 12, 2007






one am band in kdu auditorium for Kdu cf easter celebration- one cool and hip event




paul did this video for our kdu cf...which align with our tagline-i will follow you, in this video, he is asking the youth, who would u follow.. =)

Friday, September 07, 2007

books

This is the revised version
Was prompted to buy this book when it is in my hand...its like love at first sight (it nvr exist in relationship, plz don't ever believe to this lie) I read it and i noe it is God working for me to buy it... coz i cry every night after the book..God literally heal me using the book.. Establishing the essence of me as a women a.k.a female (He created human in His likeness-male and female He created them. Went through a season of God inserting the identity of being HIS bride..HE show me how HE love me for who I am (women), how HE assure me of my worth.. tis book also impart the way to be lily white (set apart) for the Lover... how God wants to heal and throw away all the other lovers, part time lovers... HE want us to give our pen to HIM, so that He can writes the best love story . I was overflow of God love as HE work in me through this book, i can only weep and weep out of my need and longing to be love.. HE show me how gentle,beautiful and intimate HE is. HE let me realize HE put a hole in us, which can only be filled by HIM alone, if not loneliness and emptiness will be in our life. U ask me wat i need now, LOVE from the lover of my soul. So shall the king greatly desire thy beauty: for he is thy Lord; and worship thou him. Psalm 45:11 KJV - as she writes- inside every young women is a princess in search of her prince..
as for gals that will do this book with me, i shall share more (more means alot alot ahaha)

God noes the desire or my one question- Am I beautiful..every girl want to know that, we are born to desire a fairy tale. But in a fallen world, we believe in too many lies and are wounded... HE want me to know that I m beautiful deep down... how I want daddy to say that I am beautiful, how much i need the love from daddy, its how we are created... Femine is a characteristic of God- inviting, captivating, alluring, giving rest, love and gentleness, caring, strength and stirring... the first four chapter is funny where the last 4 chapter is healing and love...


These two are very beautiful book...most importantly books that bring impact and realization of how we are created...Healing and love comes as well throught this two books (God working of course)

Christian Fellowship programs

Christian Fellowship come out with a new transformation... after a whole day commitee meeting, new agenda resulted... Yeap, the update are below: tada

- First of all- we decided to use the theme- lets get connected
-connect to people
-connect to God

its basically to evangelist and lead them to church
we does not function as a church, but a medium to lead them to church... a medium to touch the peers, fellowship and bring salvation.

we have to rearrange the commitee too.. we are still doing it as clement join us back.... since some of the commitee status is still in arrangement, so i won't be disclosing..

We decided to use the telecommunication like digi, celcom and hotlink for each month.. don't worry, they won't sue us for copyright.. we just have the idea of using their tagline- for september, it will be digi month- where we used the tagline of I will follow you.. For the first week of Sept, we just have a party on fri and so far so gud..its cool and we r slowly establishing the people of our program through this party..all the drinks and snacks are yellow lol, decorations too.... all the commitee wore yellow too.. bright group... we have video by paula, games by jason and snacks and drinks.. the following week, we will have issue week, where we will discuss issue like peer pressure..for the third week, we will be doing bible study about the issue, and last week of Sept, we will have a speaker to conclude ur tagline- i will follow u (the speaker will go deeper into the words relating peer pressure and also answer some questions from issue week)

Following month the tagline will be from celcom-this is kdu territory, snacks and drinks will be blue "p ... the issue week will be about what is your limit, how far will u go in touching... then the bible study week, forth week will be speaker, the fifth week we will organize outing.

For November, we will have hotlink- life unlimited (x-pax), the snacks and drinks will be in red +.+ ... the issue week will be what does it means to be live to the fullness, ur gifts and future and etc.. netx week, bible study, following week, speaker...

For every thursday, we will be doing a study on a book named Habitudes - on leadership(habit and attitudes) for 1 hour.this book is written byy Dr. Tim Elmore.. a well known christian speaker.

For girls only.. i will be doing a book named captivating and authentic beauty... mainly i will be doing it on tuesday- meet up, talks about the book if u have read it and pray about it..time not sure yet..but if u r interested just let me noe..i can pass u the books anytime..


this is the book...check it out through the web and my review on it on another post on my blog...

Revolution a.k.a POWER

Yeap, that is it- u saw my title, an even name Revolution... Just this wednesday, KDU CF (Christian Fellowship) commitee have been invited to go to Inti college in Sunway- next to Taylor college.. so, jason (one of the commitee) drive the 4 others commitee who can make it (me,clement, aaron tam, daniel sim) paul was too tired to go, while wan si stuck at home...anyway, we went early and jason become the tour guide as he studied in Taylor college bfore.. I just remember that the Asia Cafe next to Taylor is really a heaven of foods- i wish i study thr ") .. somemore the asia cafe have their own hige cyber cafe..awesome ..hehe.. we went i taylor too..its quite big, with nice lecture hall, library and auditorium hall.. nice place...We went to Inti after that, tour around as well.. their student club and society are active.. especially inti CF..

The Inti CF Ushers came and lead us to the meeting room at the appointed time.. after a time of introduction and all... the meeting started..suprisingly with worship..wow was all i can say... coz once we start to worship... the realm just change... its like we reach a different dimension with our worship... God presence is clearly thr... God is moving the new generation..beside P.S Kent and Ray, the rest of us are the new generation or wat ppl call the pioneers which mean we r the generation to start something new..the first generation... There is the new seed God is trying to birth in the pioneers, especially with this event.. Indeed, HE want to work powerfully among us...a new annointing have come... After worship, indeed, it is very encouraging to hear the testimony of the youth especially from inti CF, eg, the visions and dreams God reveal to them and most importanly the passion and love for God... Its heart warming to know a bunch of ppl who walk with God in spirit... one thing for sure, this event will be used by God to touch more ppl than we ever imagine..(p.s, if u wan to noe more about wat God reveal to them, ask me as i m nt sure whether i should disclose it in blog hehe)

The next session is vision casting of this event..how they come out with the vison to have this event and why 1 month only... FIY, 1 month for a RM 20THOUSAND K event...it is a huge event..We need to to fund raising, each of the incharge CF have to do fund raising for this event... they will give us the offer letter.. we have faith that God will provide us finacially since this event is of HIM... if u happen to stumble to my blog and read this, if u can, pls contribute (amount depend on u) =) thx first .

All KDU cf commitee can say is indeed this rally is God will.. we were praying for interCF event or to visit others CF..now with this event, our prayer is answered..we can now establish a network with other CF just as we are praying for it..Metropolitan share that they don't have many members and are also praying what is the activities and hope to have interCF too, God is a God that answer ur heart desire..Praise God and amen...there are one more CF also share the same testimony..Halleluyah

Another suprise came, P.S Kent (nw working closely with the planet shakers ministry) preaching to us... we thought its a meeting- how come have sermon -only the Father knows ;)
It was a powerful sermon, the encounter of the widow with Jesus- PS Kent challenging us to widen our jar/ capacity...After that, was a round of declaring and worship, asking God to widen our capacity, give us the burden for God to use us and asking God to come to all nation by sing the song save our nations- a powerful declaration for our nation as all of us sing in unity

Last, we are given the task for the event- we are put in charge of promo and marketing and follow up with Inti (after event)

Here are the Information of REVOLUTION :

Date: 13 of October

Venue : Sri Sedaya
Speaker : P.S Russell Evan (Planet Shakers Ministry)

Free of charge!!! we have freebies somemore

It is organize by interCF as this will be a college and university rally... CF that are involved are Sunway-Monash, Segi, Help, Kdu (us), Tarc, Inti, Metropolitan and etc...

Visit this link in facebook for more info bout this rally- http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=4925244229


Do come and see God move mightly

Thursday, August 30, 2007

what a month (august) I need money

yeap...a month of independent day..i m not sure whether it is related or not, but i think everybody will call it a month where there money flow like water... for me and some students -especially degree and hotel and tourism... assignments and reading piling up like mountain, waiting for us to conquer it...

anyway, its "the month " where kdu christian fellowship alone have 6 people birthdays... some of my frens were complaning y so many people born at this month causing us broke as we have to buy presents... well, its the UP THERE decision for lifes to be born at tis month..so cant question much..hehe... well, Blessed Birthday to Miss Angeline (aug 25), Li Yan (aug 24), Anna Grace Low (Aug 17), Daniel Sim (Aug 28), Paul Wong (Aug 29) and Abelene (Aug 30)...

A month of celebration indeed...step on the weighing machine and u will know that all the cakes and party left u bloated and gain the pounds..oh well, u will mind at first, but all the foods just satisfied u..hehe.. Anna did a barbecue- imagine all the meats,sausege, burger and etc that we consume, the best part is the majerin dat we consume a.k.a oil that we use to cook... Mr Kenny and Joram become the chefs for that day... went to eat at anna hse's balcony..cooling and pitch dark.. talking and talking... the last part before we go back is the one that make my heart pump very hard..i don't know y.. each one of us are suppose to say something gud about anna.. just before my turn i suddenly get very nervous ahaha... it happen wen I have too many things to say about the person and I don't know izzit ok for me to say it in front of all, was blushing-suprisingly...call me shy, its so not me..ahahah
Here goes, from the bottom of my heart, I am really thankful for this gal named anna, she offered me a place to stay for 1 month and drive me to work and everywhr else too.. sry le, anna, no matter wat, u r helpful..lol...(p.s. she hate it coz its like the most word ppl used to describe her-helpful helpful and helpful) this prove she have a heart of angel (or try to be one..just kidding) i also have fun in bedroom with her..(don't think the wrong way) I mean bedtime sharing or talking- but we do it in the morning at times... oh ya, tis gal veri devoted, she will do devotion every day... her favourite qoutes is to the pure, all things are pure..lol.. she is the one naive and innocent, so automatically that line will be for her...(actually wen u noe her deeper, she is crazy and corrupted-this corruption is done by me and the yam cha team, u noe who u are =p) one thing, she tend to be disconnected in yam cha which after her explanation, i think i can understand y...she also my singing partner in her car (mainly worship song and at times we corrupt song- eg, the chorus of right here waiting for you, we change to what the crap, we also redraft worship song lyrics eg My God is mighty to save exclusively for MCdonalds which is a part of our yam cha life- we r nt cult that worship MCD but just fooling around, no worry)...she is also the guitarist in her room-we play and sing together, I admire her passion in playing guitar as I tried learning from her, one key oso i can't do well after 15 minute, my tumb like numb adi oso cannot get the key correct, so i guess i have no talent or the teacher problem =p ..at times she will whack half of the junk foods in her rooms wen she is in the mood to do it and she will keep saying, once in awhile only...she will also agree with me that girls take a long time in bathroom (sometimes only actually) is because we r being productive inside =p ... i think i will stop revealing the behind bedroom scene adi..lol..too much info...last, tis is a gal which is put close to my heart and I mean it...

After Anna, we celebrated Miss Angeline, li yan, daniel and paul birthday in Paris Restaurant (It is actually a thankgiving dinner after CF fund raising) and Swensen... Swensen was the highlight as we sang birthday songs 4 times (lol) and eat the giant Earthquake ice cream- consists of 8 large scoop of different flavour ice-cream... I am in ice cream heaven...melting away in sweetness of ice cream... din eat much as quite full and everybody fighting over the ice cream ..lol... anyway, the birthday people are force to share some words about their hope for future and their future spouse quality....quality like understanding, loving, love God, intellectual and etc came out...

The KDU Hotel and Tourism food fest- which is on august 30th... The whole cafeteria is basically theirs..with all kind of foods, drinks and deserts-from ice kacang, chicken wing, western, chinese and Japan delicacy, nt mentioning otak otak, Kebab and etc... Li yan stall deco is nice..well, li yan is the deco leader for her stall and have been working hard, it is visible with the black panda eyes she have...all the stall are nicely decorated- some with Ship theme, Island theme, wild wild west and etc..Cafeteria is neredning crowded till around 2pm...btw, I also want to thx Li Yan for driving me to college and church... So yeah, another event which require money to be spend..worse or laughable, we are like force to spend all the money from the coupon we bought eventhough we don't really eat that much... we like, please go ahead and use the coupon and don't save it,just buy.. this the only situation where money are force to be spend and seem so worthless lol..

Next stop, daniel and abigail (dan sis) combine party in their hse... will c hw what happen thr.. aaron t pose a question, will we have alter call? lol, daniel just show his "speechless and what the" face...it will be interesting a birthday party with alter call...hehehehe

After that, lik ee will organize a moon cake pot bless at september 15... And he want to walk with the lantern...lik ee lik ee..i have no comment..hehehee..btw, cant wait for the foods other ppl provide and the mooncake of course..it will be a night of fellowship as well, especially with some ex-CF commitee

Thank God i only have my secondary school best fren birthday in september...which is september 8..cant wait to c her at september 16 after her exams which go on and on and on for her accounting course....

Indeed, August is a month of life and celebration...i wish money do come as the amount of birthday tis month =p well, i can day dream and pray for money hehehe.. Anyway, I just pray that the Lord will help me to appreciate ppl more on this month-especially through their birthday and other days too of course

P.S Was waiting for the cab in One U old wing cab stand... Was wondering izzit because of the merdeka eve that make it so hard to take a cab..i waited for awhile, give up to hunger and nature call... only after I eat and all, i manage to get a cab who coincidently want to go back to near my place..whew.. he ask me how long have I waited as there is some ppl who waited for hours... thr is still alot of ppl waiting for a cab even as I leave... He said the reason is the cab driver is having strike (mogok) over government for not raising the taxi fare over 12 years (rm 2 wen we first go in and now the cab driver want rm4).. no wonder i saw some cab driver purposely park their cab near the cab stand and refuse to work... well, we been praying hard for a righteous government...so i guess, the government still catious about raising prices.. Praise God as if they raise the price i really having problem as sometimes I have to rely on cab... i don't mean to not symphatize the cab driver and I understand they need to survive also, bt i think they r doing ok with rm 2...sigh, petrol rise, everthing rise.. now cab also wan a rise... rising lifestyle i would call. i need money...seriously

Wednesday, August 22, 2007

desire

I have been pondering about one thing, it is my desire to grow up that make me sin, we also have this desire to be loved and etc..all kind of desires... God created with beautiful emotions (in His likeness), HE want us to have feelings and desires just as He are.. But wen we fall, satan have captives over our desire, he manipulate and deceive us with our emotions...he can deceive u by using loneliness, pain, hurts to set u in bondage.. God created the hole (loneliness) so that He can feel us with it and only He alone can fill it.. so as we fall, we constanly seek to fill this hole but it won't work (trust me) as this place is only for Him. Eve was tempted and fall, the serpant tempted and stirred her desire to gain wisdom and desire to see things (ur eyes will be opened as the serpant said) God created this desire for wisdom and to see or learn things, HE want us to have the desire to have more wisdom about HIM and to learn about HIM.. HE created with the breath of HIS life, with brains and emotions... of course the satan (deceiver and manipulator) twisted the desire...
new international bible-genesis 2:4-7
You will not surely die," the serpent said to the woman. 5 "For God knows that when you eat of it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil."6 When the woman saw that the fruit of the tree was good for food and pleasing to the eye, and also desirable for gaining wisdom, she took some and ate it. She also gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it. 7 Then the eyes of both of them were opened, and they realized they were naked; so they sewed fig leaves together and made coverings for themselves

Tuesday, August 21, 2007

Malaysia, truly beautiful

This month have been our country independent month...with alot of interesting stuff happen...all around the world actually.. eespecially the Korean hostage...but it unite Christians all over the world to pray for them... read the newspaper and u will find out alot of things..depressing sometimes..even my fren who is a intern in the Star, who writes headlines don't read the newspaper,she wailed that it is too depressing..how ironic...hehehe... My church have been praying for Malaysia according to the NECF 40 days fast.. last fri we gather in Elder uncle Hock Seng house to pray for Msia government, states and etc... one thing , Msia is a blessed country as we don't have much nature disaster and most importantly we r consider a safe country compare to other countries... Holy Spirit also have been working in the churches, rising God's bride... alot of events have been organize by various christian organizations and churches which clearly God annointing and presence simply overflow the congregations... Lastly, just continue to lift our country into prayer..as wen God is working, the other side is working too...very hard actually..but God have the final victory and control..Praise Him...

Saturday, August 11, 2007

My church-BUC

Been joining BUC (Bandar Utama Chapel) since last year October (if I am not mistaken)... Its really nice small congregation and its a cell church... Its great to belong to a family of God-Body of Christ... This year Easter, I have been approached to make decision regarding Baptism. Together with Aaron Tam, we have a talk with our Growth Group (cell) Elder or also known as Pastor, Uncle Hock Seng about it.. Even as that time, God use this time to show me how my church function as a Body of Christ... God let me see how the BUC members support each other (elders opening house to the members, prayers for each other, parenting helps and also funeral time) I see the fellowship thr...Even as Uncle Hock Seng say, Baptism is to proclaim that u now belong to this family of Christ... I also receive Breads in Church which is one of the main functions of church.... btw, i didn't realized how much tis church have people who truly support the members and a place whr God presence comfort instead of condemning or pressuring u when u sin, untill I experience..i won't really reveal the detail of what happen (sorry for no juicy detail- bbtw, i dun think it is juicy at all) as i find it not necessary..wat matters is lessons learned and God forgiveness transfrom me and bring me to another level of submission... He heal me regarding my desire to grow up and break free, I believe in a lie that I am imature and childish as what my parent said since small. I strruggle with inadequate feeling, therefore tries anything to proof that I am capable such as being rebelious and striving hard... I learned from a hard way the first lesson of submissions, still more to come... Praise God for His ever comforting hands and embrace even as I failed Him, assuring me it will be alright with His tender voice... He lifted up all the burden and pressure with His love, only wen I am vulnerable HE can work in me...I can only surrender and abandon myself at that time..When u r the weakest, God is the strongest..Even though it happens about 1 months ago..i will contantly be reminded of it and I won't regret it happens as I truly learned form my mistake.. I won't trade it with anything...For Jesus came to change ashes into Beauty...Thanks for people who stand by me even as this time... God bless

Wednesday, August 08, 2007

update i guess

long long time didn't blog adi..just lazy hehe...sorry for my procasination..lol....(dunno spell correctly or nt)

I am a Murdorch degree student now in KDU-Praise God for His divine plan... One assignment on hand d..heheh.... I noe alot of money for me to study degree, so i can only try my best, for my future and the money my parent spent...back to college and looking forward for it

Just came back from a family and relative trip (a trip organize by my aunty) A bus of 44 people(my family, relatives and my aunty tai-chi frens plus some of their family) and a over-humour tour guide..hehe...a trip which is fattening as we sit hours in the bus and eat and eat and eat lolx..miss the foods! we visit kedah, then stay in penag, Ipoh the next day, then head back to KL... alot of history value in Penang...delicious Penang Laksa...a relaxing time with family and relatives... was amazed by how sporting and young old people can be(most of the peple in the bus aged 45 and above) they sing karoke, walk around, and play games... we play musical chair in bus and it was hilarious and fun...

well, thats the update for nw..hehe.. take care ....

Monday, July 30, 2007

books that i want...=)

The lists of books that i am craving for =)

From spiritual slavery to spiritual sonship by Jack Frost


Feathers from my nest-a mother's reflections by Beth Moore- Beth reflects on motherhood and shares many memories and spiritual applications from raising her children. A wonderful gift book for women of all ages


A heart like his by Beth Moore- Based on Scripture and Beth's probing insights into the romantic, mysterious, majestic life of David, A Heart Like His will show you how to serve God better by understanding our own unique place in His heart


Breaking Free by Beth Moore- Take a journey to discover true Christian freedom - the abundant life God intends for every believer. Learn to make freedom in Christ a daily reality through the truth of God's Word - Truth that will set us free. ** ranked #6 in Spiritual Growth category as a CBA Bestseller in February 2004


Things Pondered by Beth Moore- The first collection of Beth's Poetry & Vignettes


Bible concordance and the Message bible =)


A Perfect Wedding: Inviting the Author of Romance to Make Your Day Beautiful - by leslie and eric ludy --- In this little book, Leslie and I desire to dust off God's ancient path – a path that leads couples to the perfection of marriage intimacy. What makes a perfect wedding, and subsequently, a perfect marriage? The answer is not roses, rhymes, tender rhetoric, or even raw grit and determination. Rather, the Author of romance Himself wants to be your Wedding Planner. A wedding day doesn’t define a great and lasting marriage, but like a pulse, it identifies the life at the center of it. Humanly built wedding days set up couples for humanly marred marriages, but God-crafted wedding days provide a foundation for a beautiful lifetime of profound shared intimacy. A wedding day is a taste of what’s to come. The tenor of a wedding day can often be the tenor of an entire marriage. Is a wedding about you, the bride and groom? Or is it about Someone greater than you? Those who learn the answer to this all-important question correctly unlock the great mystery of marital success. If you are like many other couples in our generation who long for something more than mediocrity in your future marriage, then get off to the right start by assigning God the position of Wedding Coordinator. This book displays how breathtakingly beautiful your wedding day (and your marriage) can be when the Author of lasting love becomes the Guest of Honor. Included with this book is a CD of five original wedding songs that Leslie and I wrote and recorded in our own studio – each song is an expression of one of the specific truths written about in this book, and each one includes a performance track as well. One of our favorite songs on this album is a new wedding version of Faithfully – the full-length song that was originally included with When God Writes Your Love Story. Couples all around the country have used Faithfully in their weddings to express the beauty of a God-written love story.


When Dreams Come True: a love story only God could write by eric and leslie ludy- Whenever anyone says to us, “So tell us about your love story” we tell them to read When Dreams Come True. Our love story, in our humble opinion, was (and is) one of the most amazing in the history of the world. Not because of our own romantic ability – rather, because God Himself scripted the details. All of the struggles, doubts, hopes, fears, failures and triumphs of our relationship are captured in this book. During our single years and throughout our love story, Leslie and I both kept detailed journals, which we drew from when putting this book together. As a result, this story provides an intimate peak inside our hearts and minds during the process of building a God-written love story. It’s written like a novel, but the story is true. If you want a clear example of what a Heaven-built romance can look like, this is the book for you. If you have ever struggled with the idea of giving God full control of this area of your life, this book will offer you a refreshing vision of hope


When God Writes Your Love Story: The Ultimate Approach to Guy/Girl Relationships by Eric and Leslie Ludy- This book has provided the foundation for a whole new way of thinking about relationships among today’s younger generation. Rather than building a love story the way the world does (with a few Christian morals tacked on for good measure) this book introduces readers to a far superior way of building a love story…God’s way. After all, God is the One who invented the concept of romance in the first place! And God doesn’t need to imitate the world’s way of building a relationship…He has His very own perfect, amazing, beautiful way of writing a love story, and it is far more fulfilling and romantic than anything Hollywood could ever concoct. Leslie and I believe that the foundation for an amazing, lifelong love story begins even before you meet your future spouse, by allowing the Author of romance to script your love story and show you how to love like He loves. Rather than chasing after temporary relationships, this book challenges readers to give the “pen” to God and allow Him to script their love story in His own perfect time and way. In this book, we take readers through the “Four Secrets to an Amazing Love Story” – practical things that you can do now to prepare for a love story that will go the distance. From learning to love your spouse even before you meet them, to understanding the difference between mere abstinence and true purity; from practicing the skills of tenderness and selflessness that will make you a superhero spouse, to experiencing God’s best in your single years; from understanding renewed purity to making your parents your teammates – this book is loaded with inspiration, motivation, and practical insight for experiencing a God-written love story.


"Sit Walk Stand"Watchman Nee- An inspiring look at Ephesians and the believer's association with Christ, the world, and Satan. A classic by Watchman Nee



"God Of Abraham Isaac And Jacob"Watchman Nee-
The Christian life is based on the irrevocable promises of God, the enjoyment of all that God has prepared for us in Christ, and the transformation that results from the loving discipline of the Spirit. In The God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob, Watchman Nee draws upon the experiences of these Old Testament patriarchs and presents their lives as an allegory of the complete Christian experience. From our response to God's promises by faith to our ultimate transformation into sons who are conformed to the image of Christ, we must pass through the same life experiences of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. Like Abraham, we have been given the promise of God for the inheritance; like Isaac, we can enjoy all that God has planned for us in Christ His Son; and like Jacob, we must experience the discipline of the Holy Spirit for the sake of our growth and transformation


"Holy Spirit and Reality"Watchman Nee- The Christian Life seemingly involves many outward matters and things, such as Baptism, the Breaking of Bread, Worship, Praise, Prayer, Forgiveness, Humility, and Love For One Another. As such, it is easy to focus on these things but miss the spiritual reality behind them. This reality is the Holy Spirit. Apart from the Holy Spirit, who is the Spirit of Reality, all of these things, no matter how faithfully practiced, are merely outward conduct that is devoid of any real inward spiritual content. Here, Watchman Nee speaks of the believer's need to advance from outward practices to a genuine, spiritual living that is centered on knowing and experiencing the Holy Spirit. The Spirit is actively working to reveal Himself to us and to discipline us so that we may be guided into God's reality.


The liberator by: Rob Lacey
Synopsis: An engaging new paraphrase of the gospels of Matthew, Mark and Luke into the language of the city. Rob Lacey reworks the metaphors, situations and speech patterns of the gospels to create a real impact on the modern urban reader.



The Shaping of a Christian Family more books like this by Elisabeth Elliot
Elisabeth Elliot offers a unique viewpoint of parenting and family life in this inspiring book. Drawing from the Scriptures, her observations of family life in America over the past 40 years, and her own upbringing, Elliot illustrates the foundational principles and values necessary to create a Christian home and family.


The Love of a Godly Mother by Max Lucado; Ruth Bell Graham; Beth Moore; Sheila Walsh; Kathy Troccoli; Elizabeth Elliot; Anne Graham Lotz

Let me be a women by Elizabeth Eliot
"In order to learn what it means to be a woman, we must start with the One who made her." Working from Scripture, well-known speaker and author Elisabeth Elliot shares her observations and experiences in a number of essays on what it means to be a Christian woman, whether single, married, or widowed.


Love Has a Price Tag by Elisabeth Elliot
In this collection of essays, Elisabeth Elliot shows us what it means to live a life fully given to Christ. By depicting everyday encounters and events, she helps us to see meaning both in the mundane and the miraculous. From a hospital in Georgia to a mission station in the Andes, from a seminary in Massachusetts to a secluded house in Jamaica, Elisabeth Elliot introduces us to places and people where simple faith perceives the power of God in the stuff of everyday living.


Passion and Purity: Learning to Bring Your Love Life under Christ's Control by Elisabeth Elliot, Joshua Harris (Foreword by), Ruth Bell Graham (Introduction)
From the PublisherPopular seminar speaker Elisabeth Elliot has written a book about bringing one's love life under the authority of Jesus Christ. She gives direction in such areas as singleness or marriage, putting God's desires ahead of personal desires, what men look for in a woman, virginity and chastity, and the man's and woman's role in relationships.


Quest for Love: True Stories of Passion and Purity by Elisabeth Elliot

From the Publisher"What if I never marry - will God take that desire away?" "I have deep feelings for this guy, but he says I am like a sister to him. What should I do?" "Why should a man still be expected to initiate romance?" These are just a few of the questions posed in letters to Elisabeth Elliot by readers of her best-selling book Passion and Purity. In Quest for Love, Elliot shares many of these letters and responds to the writers' heartfelt needs and confusion with sound, biblical guidance. With warmth and humor, she dusts off "antiquated" concepts such as commitment, integrity, honor, and servanthood, and then applies them to dating and singleness today. Quest for Love is brimming with true stories about how men and women find each other. Some of the stories end unhappily and serve as wake-up calls to those on the edge of making serious mistakes. Others, including moving love stories of Christian heroes, give testimony to "a faithful shepherd bringing people together." The tales in this book reveal that the key to a great love life is adhering to high moral standards - no matter how old-fashioned they seem - and daily committing matters of the heart to Christ.


Why a Daughter Needs a Dad: A Hundred Reasons
by Gregory E. Lang, Janet Moran (Photographer), Janet Lankford-Moran (Photographer)
From the PublisherThe relationship between father and daughter almost defies description. Nurtured with love, the relationship strengthens and brings out the best in both, softening the rough edges of fathers and providing strength and security for their daughters. Why a Daughter Needs a Dad is one father's loving reflection upon what he brings - or hopes to bring - to his daughter's life. The warmth of hugs and laughter, the comfort of familiarity, the creation of a history from which both he and his daughter may draw - these things make up the warmhearted relationship he enjoys with his daughter and shares with readers in this sensitive and thoughtful book. Janet Lankford - Moran's photographs warmly illustrate many of the unique aspects of the ways fathers and daughters relate to one another.
The result is a book that will inspire fathers to embrace the irreplaceable role they play in their daughters' lives, to provide them with the love, nurture, and support they seek, and to enjoy the blessings that come back to them many times over.


Why a Daughter Needs a Mom by Gregory Lang
From the PublisherMothers and daughters often see themselves when they look at each other: mothers seeing themselves as a child again and daughters glimpsing the woman they will likely become. While this can be frightening at times, it also can be comforting. A daughter needs her mother to tell her the journey from girl to woman is more exciting than frightening and, with the blessing of children and grandchildren, the journey never ends. In his relationship with his own daughter, Greg Lang admits that while she once was his “playful partner in crime” and “most adoring audience,” she now turns to her mother for consolation and understanding. “Mothers are the best listeners,” he writes, “whether the news is good or bad. Moms know the reason for tears need not always be explained, but a big hug, a laugh, and chocolate always make things brighter.” A mom is a daughter’s role model through each stage of life, and wise and fortunate mothers are able to stay one step ahead of their daughters’ development along the way. A mother’s comfort soothes hurt feelings from playground to prom, from first-job pitfalls to first-pregnancy concerns. There is no substitute in a daughters’ life for Mom. With charming photographs of mothers and daughters of various backgrounds and ages, Why a Daughter Needs a Mom will inspire mothers everywhere to empower their daughters to reach their full potential in becoming strong, purposeful, independent women.


What Every Daughter Wants Her Mother to Know by Betty Sargent, Betsy Perry, Betsy F. Perry
From the PublisherDaughters and moms have a special bond, but it isn't always easy to communicate.
What Every Daughter Wants Her Mother to Know says everything to your mother that you wish you had, accented with warm photos. Sweet without being overly sentimental, every daughter's mother will love this book as an impromptu gift, thank-you, Mother's Day present or Christmas surprise.
Honest and heartfelt, here's what daughters everywhere want to share with their mom.
• "Most of all the other beautiful things in life come by twos and threes, by dozens and hundreds. Plenty of roses, stars, sunsets, rainbows, brothers and sisters, aunts and cousins, comrades, and friends-but only one mother in the whole wide world."-Kate Douglas Wiggin
• How about hiding those naked baby pictures of me when my boyfriend is around?
• "Every beetle is a gazelle in the eyes of its mother."—Moorish Proverb
• It took me years to realize that when you told me I looked tired or that my hair was dirty, you did it out of love, not criticism.


The Incredible Truth About Mothers by Bradley Trevor Greive

From the Publisher
Motherhood is the world’s most demanding – and rewarding - job. It’s a calling that comes with incredible highs and gut-wrenching lows. How to express both the joys and challenges inherent in parenting the next generation in a way that is guaranteed to leave your audience smiling with tears in their eyes? Leave it to the one and only Bradley Trevor Greive.
In this moving and yet often side-splittingly funny homage to mothers everywhere, the best-selling author has masterfully paired his insightful prose with humorous animal photography that quickly and succinctly sums up his narrative’s loving nuances. A mother tiger nuzzling her cub. A basset hound with an ice bag on her head. All are fodder and focus for BTG’s unique wit and wisdom.
From birth to toddlers to teenagers, The Incredible Truth About Motherhood covers the many stops and starts children make on their journey to adulthood and describes how devoted mothers are both teacher and student. Of course, the book ends with a heartfelt “I love you, Mom!” on behalf of the hundreds of thousands of readers who will buy it as a Mother’s Day.
Bradley Trevor Greive’s previous books have been enthusiastically received in over two dozen countries throughout the world, attracting millions of readers with his trademark combination of engaging animal photography, gentle humor, and priceless perceptions. Dear Mom, for example, has sold nearly half a million copies in the year since it was published. The Incredible Truth About Motherhood should likewise rocket to the top of best-seller lists all over the planet.


You're Wearing That?: Understanding Mothers and Daughters in Conversation by Deborah Tannen
From the PublisherDeborah Tannen's #1 New York Times bestseller You Just Don’t Understand revolutionized communication between women and men. Now, in her most provocative and engaging book to date, she takes on what is potentially the most fraught and passionate connection of women’s lives: the mother-daughter relationship.It was Tannen who first showed us that men and women speak different languages. Mothers and daughters speak the same language–but still often misunderstand each other, as they struggle to find the right balance between closeness and independence. Both mothers and daughters want to be seen for who they are, but tend to see the other as falling short of who she should be. Each overestimates the other’s power and underestimates her own. Why do daughters complain that their mothers always criticize, while mothers feel hurt that their daughters shut them out? Why do mothers and daughters critique each other on the Big Three–hair, clothes, and weight–while longing for approval and understanding? And why do they scrutinize each other for reflections of themselves? Deborah Tannen answers these and many other questions as she explains why a remark that would be harmless coming from anyone else can cause an explosion when it comes from your mother or your daughter. She examines every aspect of this complex dynamic, from the dark side that can shadow a woman throughout her life, to the new technologies like e-mail and instant messaging that are transforming mother-daughter communication. Most important, she helps mothers and daughters understand each other, the key to improving their relationship.With groundbreaking insights,pitch-perfect dialogues, and deeply moving memories of her own mother, Tannen untangles the knots daughters and mothers can get tied up in. Readers will appreciate Tannen’s humor as they see themselves on every page and come away with real hope for breaking down barriers and opening new lines of communication. Eye-opening and heartfelt, You’re Wearing That? illuminates and enriches one of the most important relationships in our lives.


I Only Say This because I Love You: Talking to Your Parents, Partner, Sibs, and Kids when You're All Adults by Deborah Tannen
SynopsisWhy does talk in families so often go in circles, leaving us tied up in knots? In this illuminating book, Deborah Tannen, the linguist and and bestselling author of You Just Don't Understand and many other books, reveals why talking to family members is so often painful and problematic even when we're all adults.


Supernatural Childbirth by Terri Mize (Author), Jackie Mize (Author)

Wednesday, June 13, 2007

words from a cards

Copy these words froma love cards...very sweet in my opinion...check it out


Long before I ever knew you, I loved the idea of you

Before I ever heard your voice, I listened for its assurance

Before I ever felt your touch, I desired its gentleness

Before I returned your first kiss, I longed for its passion

Long before I knew you, I knew that I wanted only you

And when I found you, I knew that I would love you forever ...


Let these words be our desire to the Lover of our soul, Jesus Christ..
HE is the cry and desire of our heart...Only HE satisfy us...Believe that He is the LOVER

Friday, June 01, 2007

Korean movie-- 200 pounds beauty

My relatives came over my hse on thurs... i came back home on fri to have dinner with them and after dat we went for movie (which is my emphasis here and pardon me if i go off track) so the whole car full of excited 4 teens (my 2 brothers and 2 cousins) and 2 young adults (me and my other cousin)...after much discussion and deciding...we went to cineleisure in the curve and movie on our pick is 200 pounds beauty (a korean movie) when you hear about korean movie, run to the nearest store and buy few boxes of tissues (and yes I am exaggerating it) The plot of korean movie come normally with a package of tears and laugther...

We have about 1 hour plus before the clock tick 12am which is the movie time... we found a snooker and football machine place...so the time is fill with fun and shout from the games...ahaha, first time playing snooker...(yes, i know the jaw is drooping as a result of suprise) btw, i di hit in some balls =)

Here come the review of 200 pounds beauty movie :

To summarizes it... i personally think this movie is out regarding the rise of plastic surgery in korean ladies. It is a rising idustry and profit...dats y business people lovesss ladies, their eyes shine with money as ladies will spend loads of money for beauty purposes...well, pro and cons is thr...

This movie revolves around the glamour life of singer and producers....of course, not forgeting our ugly fat duckling the heroin...the glamour life of our singer, the pretty and hot singer but (notice the but), she is not talented with notes... our heroin which have a angelic and powerful voice plus heart...FIY, she fall in love with the producer, the hero..

At the hero birthday, heroin's heart broke when she accidently heard that the singer and hero are using her for profit...she eventually seek resolve by having plastic surgery...enduring all the agony of knives cutting her flesh.

our heroin turn from a fat, ugly duckling to a beautiful swimming swarm...leaving all the guys stirred up and stalking her...She later find herself being a replacement to the once fat and ugly self... this time, she is introduce as a star for her look and voice...

She also rekindle her romance with the hero... (watch the movie to know)

The singer was jealous and angry of heroin as she was getting all attention and the singer is losing her place..so she set to find out more about her identity...

the concert is the highlight..where heroin force herself to go on stage...the moment she see her dad dancing in front (she refuse to recognize her dad before that and shoo him away as some stalker fans..her fren who backup singer with her before this took the dad away and is angry over her) she cry and stooped the guard from shooing her dad at the concert... in tears she tell the truth out- who she is and why she did it.. she finally found herself back... she apologised for what she did...the crowds encourage her and concert continue in tears....her fren came to the stage in back up singer helping her to finish the song as she can't hold her tears..she went down and hug her dad...

she is still a singer but using her real name after that...she concentrate in her singing and taking care of her mentally ill dad which assume her as his wife...

one point, girls struggle with issue whether they are desirable or not... eventough they are pretty, they still wander around searching affirmation of opposite sex...they want to know whether they have people desire and love them or not. I too struggle with this...it only improve when I allow God to work in this area. God will constanly remind me of how desirable I am...only He our bridegroom can satisfy the needs of being love...for He put in our hearts the longing...He want us to be satisfy in His love alone.

Monday, May 21, 2007

Back!!

Been missing in action...i mean in blogging...well. lotsa things happen...Praise God for this season... too many things dat i hav experience in God n also life. too much to be blog...

anyway, was typing in lunch time, ahaha..nth to do.. oh ya, working nw... experience the so called 'world' ....

One thing...no matter what, God is here to assure me, tenderly whispering His love eventough i keep doubting His assuring voice...bt i have to give up n trust Him in the end...of course God win..lolx
realized dat God can be so real and in the midst of your exsistence...no matter wat is the circumstances...

He steal my heart away n lock it in His beauty and glory... I am the runaway bride which now found by my bridegroom and He shower me with His love and welcome arm...Every day, He will satisfy me and whsiper to my ear how much He love and care for me, He hold my hand, embrace me ...My heart is full of life with His love...
When I call Him, He will be by my side instanly..His name(Abba) is like a rushing wind, touches my heart with love, life and adoration.. my bridegroom love for me is not till death do us apart, but His commitment to me and vice versa is till eternity and death won't do us apart...unless I choose to runaway from this commitment again...

Everyday, He bring me to the chamber, tenderly brushing my hair and kissing me His forgiveness for I am runaway bride before...chamber is the place where our relationship will be restored...the beautiful chamber is also a place for Him to prepare me to be fully and complete as His bride (satisfied with His love alone and make whole by His love) My longing for love (as i were created for love) is fill by Him in the sacred place... Slowly, as I run to Him...He reveal to me His heart desire and I reveal my desire, weakness, strength, loneliness and struggle, etc...

He assure me of His love by bringing me to places like beach watching sunsets and sunrise...He also bring me to a places whr I am covered by roses... at these place, HE will tell me He love me and how desirable I am to HIM...tears of joy and healing rolling down like waterfall from my cheeks as I was healed from the lie and words that I am nothing, unworthy and undesirable... freedom from rejection... with HIM, I found the true freedom that i crave and long for, I now can be like the horse running freely at the green pastures...even better, i am flying in HIS arm

My desire to be a princess is fullfilled...fairy tale have come true! to be happily ever after, there is still a long way to go..the road is narrow but love conquer everything...